Sunday, October 9, 2011

Unpredictable POTSy Presents

I LOVE surprises! The unexpected card in the mail. A sink full of dishes magically cleaned by the cleaning fairy (my amazing daughter). Or one of my favorites, a picture drawn by one of my students showing us eating chocolate cake together because she knows it's my favorite! Surprises are great from everyone with one exception, my evil arch nemesis POTS which seems to have a dark view of how I like to be surprised.

After three years of having POTS I'm still surprised by the unpredictability of POTS. I've learned what kinds of things trigger Mr. POTS and try to avoid them like the plague. Over the years I've become better at adjusting my activities to avoid a POTSy crash. It's the times when I've done absolutely nothing and become symptomatic that take me by surprise. For example; I'm on my computer and all of a sudden my heart is racing, I'm short of breath and dizzy. If you're thinking "hmmmm..... what web site is she looking at?", no I'm just reading posts on Facebook. This week it happened during a staff meeting at work. The principal had given us some reading on educational practices. All of us were reading quietly when my heart began racing, I became short of breath, dizzy and the words became blurred and unreadable. All I wanted to do was curl up in a back corner of the room. I didn't have my purse with me and needed to get some salt in me ASAP, but there was no way I could walk to my classroom without ending up on the ground somewhere on campus. Luckily I was sitting next to a close friend who went to my classroom for my purse. My inspiration for writing this blog is the fact that right now I should be sitting in church with my church family enjoying a good sermon but my heart rate is 160 and bp is 90/75. I'm in no condition to drive or sit for long periods of time. As I write I've taken several breaks because sitting for too long makes me worse. Seriously POTS your timing sucks!

Another unpredictable part of POTS is the knowledge that it can take a turn for the worse which could leave you hospitalized or even lead to death. One day your sharing "normal" POTSy posts with your friends, the next day you hear that they are in the hospital and you pray for a quick recovery for your friend and a couple days later they have died from complications. This month complications from POTS has taken two very young woman. My prayers are with their families and friends who have lost a precious part of their lives. Death is a reminder to love those closest to you. To be thankful for what we DO have. To appreciate what we CAN do and to live every moment to it's fullest.

Inspired to dance in the storms of life,

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven-
A time to give birth, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to uproot what is planted.
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to tear down, and a time to build up.
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance.
A time to throw stones, and a time to gather stones;
A time to embrace, and a time to shun embracing.
A time to search, and a time to give up as lost;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away.
A time to tear apart, and a time to sew together;
A time to be silent, and a time to speak.
A time to love, and a time to hate;
A time for war, and a time for peace.

Lord, give me the wisdom to know how to spend the precious time you have given me.